I’ve found you. And she had felt found during those few moments in her dream when she’d been with Nikolai. Had felt discovered, even though she hadn’t known she was lost. More than that, the ring from her dream—the ring he had placed on her finger—teased her memory. She had seen it before, and not just on the monk, the car at the train station, or the retreat’s website. She heard Nikolai’s voice on the wind of memory: You have to remember. She let herself drift back to the dream, seeing and feeling the ring on her finger, willing her mind to find the connection. A minute later, she thought she had it. It made her think of her mother. She jumped out of bed and padded on bare feet to the closet, reaching behind a bunch of stuff to the box on the top shelf. She hadn’t looked at the box in a long time—years, really—but she still felt a pang as it came into view. Careful not to let it swing open on the way down, she sat on the floor, bracing herself before lifting the hinged lid.
