Sanders I still can`t believe what has happened. All these years I pictured Brendan on the road, travelling from town to town, being happy and healthy. I never would have had the thought he might not be there anymore. Oh, dear Lord, why? I can`t stop blaming myself. If I had never left him, he would still be alive. He`d be happy. We would both be happy. How one single decision can influence the lives of so many. I am unbelievably sorry that you lost your only child. I have two children of my own… - but you know that already if you read my letters. By the way, I`m not mad at you for reading them. I`m even glad, because now I know the truth. Even if it hurts. But all this time I wondered why Brendan didn`t reply my letters, now I know the reason. You know, writing these letters was the only support I had in the last couple of years. It was like talking to a therapist. It helped me a lot, even if only soul-wise. Physically and emotionally I am still stuck in this misfortune.
