After years of searching for a parking space, I made my way through an obstacle course of frenzied shoppers into a burst of climate-controlled warm air. The cacophony of voices and holiday music rattled my brain so much it was hard to think—which wasn’t a bad thing, because if I thought too much I’d lose my nerve. I noticed two guys and a girl from school, loaded with shopping bags. The girl smiled and waved. I waved back, but couldn’t smile. Hanging out at the mall was usually fun, but being here alone was sad and ironic. Penny-Love and I had planned to come here before life changed drastically. All the awful drama with Jacques and Jade and Josh. How strange to be here without any friends, passing jewelry shops advertising 75 percent off diamonds, a bath and body shop with an elf offering free soap samples, a toy store with singing electronic snowmen. I felt disconnected, as if the silver cord connecting me to ordinary life had been severed.
