The Glass Is Always Greener (2011) - Plot & Excerpts
My eyes opened wider as well. The Ovumkophs, bless their hearts, did not abide by the “less is more” principle. Instead they believed in gilding the lily, the furniture, the walls, even the floor tiles. If they did make it to Heaven and were privileged to walk the celestial golden streets, how would they ever know when they’d arrived? “Wow,” I finally said. “You don’t think it’s too much, do you?” There was an unmistakable challenge in the sheepdog’s voice, and a familiar Piedmont accent. I gave the odd butler a closer look. It wasn’t really a dog, of course. It was a woman with an unfortunately large nose and volumes of hair—goodness gracious, and a bucket full of kittens! It was none other than Tina Ovumkoph herself! And in skintight jeans and—oops, when her hair parted for a second, I could see a shamefully low-cut blouse that displayed acres of boobelege. Okay, so maybe that’s not a real word, but it ought to be. This was serious hoochie-mama stuff that shimmied and shook, and which briefly made me consider batting for the other team.
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