Abba's Child: The Cry Of The Heart For Intimate Belonging (2002) - Plot & Excerpts
Poignant Quotes:The sorrow of God lies in our fear of Him, our fear of life, and our fear of ourselves.In my experience, self-hatred is the dominant malaise crippling Christians and stifling their growth in the Holy Spirit.Often breakdowns lead to breakthroughs.If we conceal our wounds out of fear and shame, our inner darkness can neither be illuminated nor become a light for others…but when we dare to live as forgiven men and women, we join the wounded healers and draw closer to Jesus.Living out of the false self creates a compulsive desire to present a perfect image to the public so that everybody will admire us and nobody will know us.This is the man I want myself to be but who cannot exist, because God does not know anything about him. And to unknown to God is altogether too much privacy. My false and private self is the one who wants to exist outside the reach of God’s will and God’s love – outside of reality and outside of life.The sad irony is that the impostor cannot experience intimacy in any relationship.The false self specializes in treacherous disguise. He is the lazy part of self, resisting the effort, asceticism, and discipline that intimacy with God requires.Self-hatred always results in some form of self-destructive behavior.[the true self is:] unself-conscious, unpretentious, immersed in life, absorbed in the present moment, breathing in God as naturally as a fish swimming in water.It is the story of an ordinary man whose soul was seduced and ravished by Jesus Christ.Define yourself radically as one beloved by God. God’s love for you and his choice of you constitute your worth. Accept that, and let it become the most important thing in your life.We give glory to God simply by being ourselves.“Who am I?” asked Merton, and he responded, “I am one loved by Christ.” This is the foundation of the true self.Our controlled frenzy creates the illusion of well-ordered existence. We move from crisis to crisis, responding to the urgent and neglecting the essential.The false self is skilled at the controlled openness that scrupulously avoids any significant self-disclosure.“In a revealed religion, silence with God has a value in itself and for its own sake, just because God is God. Failure to recognize the value of mere being with God, as the beloved, without doing anything, is to gouge the heart out of Christianity.” – Edward SchillebeeckxI take myself less seriously, become aware that the breath of the Father is on my face and that my countenance is bright with laughter in the midst of an adventure I thoroughly enjoy.We huff and puff to impress God, scramble for brownie points, thrash about trying to fix ourselves, and live the gospel in such a joyless fashion that it has little appeal to nominal Christians and unbelievers searching for truth.My dignity as Abba’s child is my most coherent sense of self.Because the shining sun and the falling rain are given both to those who love God and to those who reject God, the compassion of the Son embraces those who are still living in sin.Experientially, the inner healing of the heart is seldom a sudden catharsis or an instant liberation from bitterness, anger, resentment, and hatred. More often it is a gentle growing into oneness with the Crucified who has achieved our peace through His blood on the cross. This may take considerable time because the memories are still so vivid and the hurt is still so deep. But it will happen. The crucified Christ is not merely a heroic example to the church: He is the power and wisdom of God, a living force in His present risenness, transforming our lives and enabling us to extend the hand of reconciliation to our enemies.The heartfelt compassion that hastens forgiveness matures when we discover where our enemy cries.Living in the wisdom of accepted tenderness profoundly affects my perception of reality, the way I respond to people and their life situations.The self-acceptance that flows from embracing my core identity as Abba’s child enables me to encounter my utter brokenness with uncompromising honesty and complete abandon to the mercy of God. As my friend Sister Barbara Fiand said,”Wholeness is brokenness owned and thereby healed.”Instead of expanding our capacity for life, joy, and mystery, religion often contracts it.Blame is a defensive substitute for an honest examination of life that seeks personal growth in failure and self-knowledge in mistakes.A vague uneasiness about ever being in right relationship with God haunts the pharisee’s conscience. The compulsion to feel safe with God fuels this neurotic desire for perfection. This compulsive endless moralistic self-evaluation makes it impossible to feel accepted before God. His perception of personal failure leads to a precipitous loss of self-esteem and triggers anxiety, fear, and depression.In sharp contrast to the pharisaic perception of God and religion, the biblical perception of the gospel of grace is that of a child who has never experienced anything but love and who tries to do her best because she is loved. When she makes mistakes, she knows they do not jeopardize the love of her parents. The possibility that her parents might stop loving her if she doesn’t clean her room never enters her minds. They may disapprove of her behavior, but their love is not contingent on her performance. For the Pharisee the emphasis is always on personal effort and achievement. The gospel of grace emphasizes the primacy of God’s love. The Pharisee savors impeccable conduct; the child delights in the relentless tenderness of God.The gospel portrait of the beloved Child of Abba is that of a man exquisitely attuned to His emotions and uninhibited in expressing them. The Son of Man did not scorn feelings as fickle and unreliable. They were sensitive emotional antennae to which He listened carefully and through which He perceived the will of His Father for congruent speech and action.Our inner child is not an end in itself but a doorway into the depths of our union with our indwelling God, a sinking down into the fullness of the Abba experience, into the vivid awareness that my inner child is Abba’s child, held fast by Him, both in light and in shadow.Limiting the resurrection either to the past or to the future makes the present risenness of Jesus largely irrelevant, safeguards us from interference with the ordinary rounds and daily routine of our lives, and preempts communion now with Jesus as a living person.In other words, the resurrection needs to be experienced as present risenness. If we take seriously the word of the risen Christ, ”Know that I am with you always; yes, to the end of time” (Matthew 28:20), we should expect that He will be actively present in our lives. If our faith is alive and luminous, we will be alert to moments, events, and occasions when the power of resurrection is brought to bear on our lives. Self-absorbed and inattentive, we fail to notice the subtle ways in which Jesus is snagging our attention.Hope knows that if great trials are avoided great deeds remain undone and the possibility of growth into greatness of soul is aborted.The central miracle of the gospel is not the raising of Lazarus or the multiplication of the loaves or all the dramatic healing stories taken together. The miracle of the gospel is Christ, risen and glorified, who this very moment tracks us, pursues us, abides in us, and offers Himself to us as companion for the journeyContemplation, defined as looking at Jesus while loving Him, leads not only to intimacy but to the transformation of the person contemplating.Our impulse to tell the salvation-story arises from listening to the heartbeat of the risen Jesus within us.The imposter recoils at the prospect of telling the story because he fears rejection. He is tense and anxious because he must rely on himself; his power is limited by his paltry resources. He dreads failure.The moment we acknowledge that we are powerless, we enter into the liberating sphere of the risen One and we are freed from anxiety over the outcome.The heart is the symbol we employ to capture the deepest essence of personhood. It symbolizes what lies at the core of our being; it defines irreducibly who we really are. We can know and be known only through revealing the revelation of what is in our heart.“All religion experience at its roots is an experience of an unconditional and unrestricted being in love.” – Bernard LonerganThe recovery of passion begins with the recovery of my true self as the beloved…John did not believe that Jesus was the most important thing; he believed that Jesus was the only thing.Until I lay my head on Jesus’ breast, listen to His heartbeat, and personally appropriate the Christ-experience of Johns’ eye-witness, I have only a derivative spirituality.The Christ of faith is no less accessible to us in His present risenness than was the Christ of history in His human flesh to the beloved disciple.Leadership in the church is not entrusted to successful fund-raisers, brilliant biblical scholars, administrative geniuses, or spellbinding preachers (though these assets may be helpful), but to those who have been laid waste by a consuming passion for Christ – passionate men and women for whom privilege and power are trivial compared to knowing and loving Jesus.In John’s Gospel, the Jews are said to be incapable of believing because they “look to one another for approval” (5:44). There appears to be a radical incompatibility between human respect and authentic faith in Christ.Anthony of Padua opened every class he taught with the phrase, “Of what value is learning that does not turn to love?”The one great passion in Jesus’ life was His Father. He carried a secret in His heart that made Him great and lonely. …who we are in God is of ultimate significance. Who one is transcends what one does or what one says or what descriptive traits and qualities one has.If you want to know what a person really believes, don’t just listen to what he says, watch what he does.A profound mystery: God becomes a slave. This implies very specifically that God wants to be known through servanthood. Such is God’s own self-disclosure.The imponderable trait of the human psyche is its ability to make irrational judgments about worthwhile human investments along with its refusal to view life in light of eternity.Saint Benedict, the founder of Western monasticism, offers the sober advice to “keep your own death before your eyes each day.” It is not a counsel to morbidity but a challenge to faith and fortitude. Until we come to terms with this primal fact of life, as Parker Palmer noted, there can be no spirituality worth speaking of.“The prospect of being hanged concentrates a man’s mind wonderfully.” – Samuel JohnsonMy death-defying no to despair at the end of my life and my life-affirming yes to seemingly insurmountable problems in the midst of my life are both animated by hope in the invincible might of the risen Jesus and in the immeasurable scope of His power in us who believe (Ephesians 1:19).Paul Claudel once stated that the greatest sin is to lose the sense of sin.The release from chronic egocentricity starts with letting Christ love them where they are.The lives of those fully engaged in the human struggle will be riddled with bullet holes. Whatever happened in the life of Jesus is in some way going to happen to us. Wounds are necessary. The soul has to be wounded as well as the body. To think that the natural and proper state is to be without wounds is an illusion. Those who wear bulletproof vests protecting themselves from failure, shipwreck, and heartbreak will never know what love is. The unwounded life bears no resemblance to the Rabbi.Confession of fault requires a good self-concept. Repression of fault means a bad self-concept.The ragtag cabal of disciples who have caught the spirit of the bride, opened the door to Jesus, reclined at the table, and listened to His heartbeat will experience at least four things.First, listening to the Rabbi’s heartbeat is immediately a Trinitarian experience.Second, we realize we are not alone on the Yellow Brick Road.Third, when we recline at the table with Jesus we will learn that the recovery of passion is intimately connected with the discovery of the passion of Jesus.The etymological root of “passion” is the Latin verb passere, “to suffer.”Christianity consists primarily not in what we do for God but in what God does for us – the great, wondrous things that God dreamed up and achieved for us in Christ Jesus.Application:Know GodLove GodLove people – pass on to others what God has shown me about enjoying him and drawing near to HimMake disciplesBecome like Jesus
A pastor friend of mine gave me this book to read. I am not sure what prompted it, perhaps he saw something in me that would be helped by reading the book.If that was his goal, he hit a home run!I remember the night vividly that I found Christ, really found Him. There were some days after that when I knew my life was different, richer and far better than it had been. I began feeling unworthy and said so in my daily prayer walks. Then one morning when I uttered that word - unworthy - He spoke to me. Yes, He did - for those of you that doubt Him communicating . . . it is true. I did not believe it before either. But there was no mistaking who was communicating with me.Since that time I have tried to find ways to measure up to Him in how I live my life and ways to serve. Active at church, host every 4th week at church, volunteer at the church's resource center, help to support a ministry and poor church in Londrina, Brasil. Sounds like I do a lot, right? Somehow it never seems to be enough. In my mind. And those feelings of being unworthy still creep into my consciousness.This book helped me to see that - that part of me that feels unworthy and not measuring up is the imposter in me (dare I say Satan).The imposter in me - and yes, you - prevents true intimacy with Christ. Something that we all need and is freely given by Christ.Oh I know I cannot - nor can anyone - reach perfection. Still, the base line can be raised even if ever so slowly and recognizing that as well as ceasing be so self-critical is important to further efforts to serve.I bet the number of people who have fled the church due to it being too patient or compassionate is small. Rather, the number that have fled due to the church being too judgmental and unforgiving is far, far higher. That is truly tragic.One thing that occurred to me is that the leadership in church is entrusted not to the fund raisers, Biblical scholars or preachers. Rather, it is entrusted to those who have found a passion for His love, for sharing His love and for a personal relationship with Christ.To stand up for truth and for human dignity can be a lonely role. We often find friends and associates distancing themselves from us when we do those kinds of things. They may even criticize you for that. Don't make waves. When in Rome, do as the Romans do attitude.As a Christian I came away from this book with a resolve to not drift - when I sometimes do - or say nothing when others say things that are not right. I was reminded that Christ told us to love our enemies and do good to those who hate us. On the other hand, I do not think Christ expected us to play "kissy-face" with them, either.It takes a strong conversion to accept that God is relentless in His love and compassion for each of us. This - in spite of our sins and shortfalls - but with them. God does not condone or support evil, but He does not withhold His love for us because there is evil in us.Since coming to Christ over 12 years ago, I have continued to live a life that will be pleasing to others. The problem with that is that the terms I set for that were hardly ever met and surely there was seldom if any positive feedback from those I was trying to please. I say that because that is how I saw His love for me . . . I did not measure up and only when I did measure up - in my mind - did I believe He loved me.The bottom line here is that God loves us not in spite of our sins, but with our sins. Knowing and accepting that will help us to obey Him.I will close with a verse that sums it up for me: John 8:1-111 but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.2 At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. 9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
What do You think about Abba's Child: The Cry Of The Heart For Intimate Belonging (2002)?
[Note: This book was provided free of charge by Tyndale Press/Nav Press in exchange for an honest review.]It was the title of the book that first drew me to reading it, and then when I got the book I was concerned because I hated the other book I had read from the author with a passion. What is bad theology, though, often springs from the legitimate longings of the heart, and such is the case with this author. To be sure, Brennan Manning lived a complicated life, with a struggle against alcoholism, and a long period in the Franciscan Order, including early fame, before leaving the order and marrying. He gained an early celebrity following as a writer, but later turned against it, describing it in this book as being an Imposter seeking fame. It is that chapter of this book that has made this a famous book, yet even here this fame is misunderstood, for although we see in the fame of our age a great deal of attention seeking, it springs from insecurity and vulnerability, and desires our compassion and not our scorn, and the use of this writing by many has been to heap scorn on others.This book demonstrates in large amounts that the author has sought to wrestle for honesty and candor in a world that values surface appearances, to struggle to show love to others, even the unlovable for many of us (myself included) have deep fears of being unlovable because of the darkness we have suffered in our lives. As the core of this book is the struggle to accept that we are loved by God as we are, and that God loves us too much to want to see us remain as we are, but wants us to become like Him, and that our obedience to Him should spring from a security in His love and in the overflowing repercussions of that trust. In focusing on in that love, this book is a very good one, perhaps even a great one. Certainly, by pointing to love, and to a realization that Jesus Christ did not come to change the law, but change the motivation of obeying it from a desire to appear righteous and justify ourselves to obedience out of love and springing concern for the well-being of others, the author points to the truth of the matter. This is so even if he imperfectly understood the law and certainly was no greatly obedient person in the course of his own life, and even though it is difficult to show love and tenderness to those who hate us and attack us.The author also wisely recognizes that this book is more about application than about intellectual understanding. Such intellectual wisdom it possesses is largely due to the astute and thoughtful quotes included from other writers. Yet the focus even here is on application, for love is not about knowing, but about doing, even doing when it is difficult and unrewarded. By pointing to the present reality of God’s presence, even in times of trial, even in dark moments, even in loss and brokenness (and especially then), the author avoids pat answers and wrestles with the darkness we all struggle against. And it is that wrestling and that struggling that allow us to become more like our Lord and our Savior. Hopefully, in that struggle we see enough truth about God and about ourselves neither to present a false appearance to the world nor to have a false picture of God. For we are all God’s children, and as imperfectly as we may be loved by ourselves, by our family, and by those whom we love, we are perfectly loved by God, even where we struggle to see it. And once we know we are loved, we can properly show love to others in turn. Small wonder that this little book (it is only a little more than 150 pages) should be so loved, for who did not want to read that they were loved for who they are, in spite of all the ways that we are broken in our fallen world?
—Nathan Albright
The right book at the right time for me. Getting friendly with the impostor within as well as the little girl inside me, practicing letting God love me and living as the Beloved, believing "my Abba is quite fond of me"...all these things would've felt too woo-woo for me at one point. Now I'm all in. Right now, I'm pretty much only interested in those who share from transformative, authentic, and relentlessly practical experiences with brokenness, relationships with real people, and with a God who is All-Love. Brennan Manning is one of those people, and he references others I am looking forward to checking out as well. In the places where I find it hard to believe, I can believe that Brennan believes, which is enough of a bridge for me to cross over.
—Ainsley
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through Tyndale House book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”41C8MaOV3bLAbba’s Child: The Cry of the Heart for Intimate Belonging by Brennan ManningAbba’s Child enables the reader to see and hear beyond the lies, myths, and inner voices which tell them, they are not always worthy of God’s love and the benefits of being His children. Abba’s Child shows the reader how they can be honest with themselves, God, and others as they discover their true Father’s (Jesus) Father (God).I experienced inspiration, insight, and revelation throughout each and every chapter within Abba’s Child. A personal message was received by myself in each chapter. There are scripture verses used within Abba’s Child in order to support and bring understanding to each chapter’s content which the reader examines.For me, Abba’s Child has been a definite page-turner. I look forward to reading Abba’s Child over and over again as well as referring back to its many truths, many times over.I highly recommend Abba’s Child for all to read!
—Faith
