I said, as the innkeeper poured me a beer. “In the morning I discovered the secret of changing base metal into gold. In the afternoon, I murdered my wife.” The innkeeper looked at me. “That’ll be two bits,” he said. I dug in my sleeve for the coins. “You don’t believe me,” I said. “I believe everybody,” the innkeeper replied. “It’s my job. Will you be wanting dinner, or just the room?” Two bits from seven leaves five. “Just the room.” “Ah.” The barman nodded and turned away. Alchemists, murderers and other cheapskates, the back of his neck seemed to be saying. I picked up my beer and looked at it. Worse things had happened, but not for a very long time. I drank it anyway. I was thirsty. * Saloninus the philosopher was born in Elpis towards the end of the reign of Philopoemen VI (the exact date is not recorded). He showed early promise during his time at the university, but was prevented from completing his studies by the death of his uncle, on whom he was financially dependent.
