It's me, Kelly. Where are you?' I need to ask her about these bloody letters and to tell her that there's nothing untoward in the house. There's no sign of any improper behaviour from Rufus at all. In fact, the only improper behaviour is from her – nicking all my post. And from me – breaking into my boyfriend's desk with his treasured dagger. Elody has only just left the beauticians, but she senses the urgency in my voice and, more likely, is thrilled by the sound of the devastation I've caused in Rufus's office, so promises she'll come over as soon as she possibly can and explain to me where the letters are and why she took them. 'I'll be there before you can say "Gucci",' she says. 'Once I've dealt with some essentials, I'll be with you.' The essentials, it turns out, are waiting for her nails to dry and buying a sparkly clutch bag with matching sequined purse. By the time she arrives, I'm frantic. 'I took your letters so we could check there was nothing rude or offensive in them,' she says.
