‘No, no, no, no, no, no!’ I said. ‘Not to Aunt Susan’s! Not for a whole week! No, no, no, no!’ Mum wasn’t backing down. ‘Frankly,’ she said, ‘I don’t believe I have to listen to any complaints from the person who burned our entire house to a crisp.’ I had to defend myself. ‘I did not burn the entire house to a crisp.’ I should have kept my mouth shut. Mum waved an arm around what little was left of our kitchen. ‘Excuse me? Are these walls the cheery colour that they used to be, or are they black? I don’t recall choosing this nice “charred wood” theme for the cupboards. Is that clean water gushing out of the tap, or some dark dribble of sludge from melted pipes? And aren’t we lucky that the sun’s still up, because it’s not as if, when I flick on this light switch, anything actually happens.’ ‘Look,’ I said for the millionth time, ‘I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to forget that I was making that toast. I didn’t realize that I’d left that tea towel lying across the grill.
What do You think about Eating Things On Sticks (2010)?
