I look at the writing after I’ve done it and I feel like the stupidest guy ever. I can’t help thinking a guy who writes like that should not be allowed to cross the street by himself. Good thing there are pretty much no streets around here. And I have to write. After the war I might never do it again, but I have to be in contact with certain people right now or it’s worse even than being dead. Brother Ivan, Some days here everything surprises you. Some days nothing does. Have you noticed that? Well no because nothing ever surprises you because you are always ready for everything, right, and if you’re not ready for it then it’s probably worse for the surprise than it is for you. I’m almost like your equal now so what do you think of that? See, because this is a letter and not a faceto-face I can tell you that and not be scared that you are going to murder me.
