Gideon Smith And The Mechanical Girl (2013) - Plot & Excerpts
A steam- hammer was banging like a two-shilling tart, the sound of a woodpecker ferreting for grubs, offering a fainter, yet no less annoying, counterpoint. He rearranged his morning erection in his sagging underwear and tried to separate the two sounds. The steam-hammer was the thudding hell of a hangover, evidenced by the stale gin sweat clinging to his tongue. The woodpecker was the ceaseless rapping on the door. “Hold on a minute!” Bent yelled, his own voice driving into his head like a gravedigger’s spade. He clutched his temples with both meaty fists and sank back into his pillow, murmuring, “Oh, sweet Jesus, fuck me sideways in a barrow of tripe.” Bent threw his bulk over the side of his bed, landing heavily on the bare floorboards with a thump, which prompted a volley of bangs with a broom handle from the spiteful old shrew below. Bent put his oily lips to a dusty knothole in the floor and shouted, “Fuck off!” Bent prepared himself for the abject misery of standing upright.
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