Half Asleep In Frog Pajamas (2010) - Plot & Excerpts
[Originally appeared on New Reads and Old Standbys in May 2009:]I initially bought this book at the urging of a friend of mine who swore up and down that it was the best book he’d read “in forever, it’s sick, seriously, go out and read this now.” Before I go any further, let me point out that he uses the word “sick” as a synonym for “awesome,“ and the word pops up in conversation with him rather frequently. For a moment I honestly believed the book was disgusting, depraved or just plain rude, before I realized what he actually meant.As it turns out, the first time I attempted to read this novel my initial fears weren’t too far off. While not actually rendering me physically nauseous, there was something about this book that got on my nerves so much that, after fifty pages, I put it down and forgot about it for a few years. It could have been any number of things, really.It could have been the fact that the book is narrated in second person perspective, like a Choose Your Own Adventure, which for some people is so highly distracting and dizzying that they avoid the particular format like the plague. You will really like this book if you are a narcissist, or like to fantasize about being someone else. In fact, if this is the case, you can feel yourself looking the book up on Amazon and purchasing it this very moment, paying for it with your own credit card. See? See how irritating that could become?It could have been that the book deals in mid-90s stock exchange drama, a subject I could honestly care less about. I have somewhat of a distaste for hardcore white-collar dealings and this book is full of characters and terminology that, while I didn’t have difficulty understanding, I certainly wasn’t all that fascinated by. It could also be the fact that the main character is a woman I would consider to be the perfect photo negative of myself. She’s career-driven, obsessed to be more accurate, concerned only with money and the stock index and the current going price of Fortune 500 shares. She’s a cultureless bitch in a Porche she hasn’t paid off yet, in clothes she hasn’t yet reimbursed her credit card for, living in an apartment she deems too small and low class for her that she’s desperate to move out of, banking her entire existence on getting into a place with a doorman and and a few hundred extra yards of space inside. Oh, she’s just a treat, this prudish, squeaky voiced woman with her older, too sincere, rich-as-hell-but-unconcerned-with-money Christian boyfriend that she keeps around for no reason at all. Did I mention the boyfriend lives with Andre, a born-again macaque that was once one of the boldest jewel thieves in France? No?I spent fifty pages inside the head of this woman, thanks to Robbins’ choice of narrative, and the whole time I was screaming to get out. She hates sex, everything is gross to the point where she blushes at the drop of a hat, she hates her Filipina background and her hippie parents, she hates not having money and the world laid at her feet and she hates the common people of Seattle. In addition to an overly nice but boring boyfriend and his pet monkey, her best friend is a 300 pound tarot reader named Q-Jo, and she hates being seen with Q-Jo in public because, oh yeah, the world hates fat people, especially fat people in purple turbans and other garish attire, so she keeps her best friend swept up under the proverbial rug in order to maintain her professional veneer. I was rather amazed I got to page fifty, seeing as the whole time I just wanted to slap her. Or myself, seeing as I was supposed to be her this entire time. I felt pretty disgusted as I put it back on my shelf, relieved to find something a bit more enjoyable to spend my time on. And there that book sat, for two more years at least, until I picked it up again a few weeks ago. I blame my recently-acquired interest in late twentieth and early twenty-first century humor fiction for sending me back to Half Asleep. Having read Barry and Coupland and Nielan over the last six months to a year, my attention turned towards Robbins again, a writer that numerous people have gushed to me over. Rather than buying another one of his books, or trying to find copies in the library (I love libraries but get a bit antsy over their rigid time restraints, due to my short attention span and habit of flitting back and forth between books) I decided to pick up and read Half Asleep. The whole way through. No more putting it off and leaving it shelved, telling myself I’d get around to actually completing it at a later date. Nope. Going to read it now.And read it I did. I have to say that the second time is a charm for this one. It was so much easier this time around.I found myself again rolling my eyes and feeling disgusted by Gwendolyn Mati and her obsession with emerging from the long Easter weekend triumphant over all of Wall Street and earning millions during an impending crash. That’s what this book is about at its core, a market on the brink of annihilation and a young, incompetent stock broker furiously trying to cover her possibly illegal (and most definitely amoral) investment strategies from both boss and client. It’s also about philosophy, capitalism, African tribalism, sex, disease, space aliens, telepathy, hallucinogens and the arcane. It could also, if you stretch your imagination a tiny bit, be about love. I started off wanting to beat the holy hell out of Gwen, just as I did last time, but pushing through this novel, page by page, I was able to witness her transformation from a completely self-obsessed, arrogant bitch to a woman who might have her heart in the right place even if she’s a bit on the narcissistic side. It was an amazing albeit snail-paced transformation, made all the better and worth waiting for by numerous encounters along the way that leave her humiliated and knocked down more than a few pegs. There are a few places where I had to hold my giggles in. Is it possible to experience Schadenfreude against yourself? In this instance, I think so. And at the end, after I was flushed of all available derision, I actually felt a bit good for her.
A half-filippina wannabe stockmarket hotshot, a born-again macaque (monkey) which belongs to your serious Christian boyfriend, an ex-stockmarket whizz turned burned-out rocker, a tarot reader friend the size of Jabba the Hut who goes missing, the Safe Sex Rapist - these are just some of the unforgettable crazy characters in Tom Robbins's novel Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas.Written in the mid-90s when Japan's immense real-estate bubble was just beginning to plummet and enter the meltdown stage, and the 'greed is good' creed of Wall Street etc. was starting to become passe, Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas (a comical passing reference to mankind who has evolved from amphibious states) is a real, classic and witty Robbins romper-stomper. As usual, this book will make you laugh out loud, make you feel slightly horny when you read the juicy sections and have you scratching your head at the esoteric perplexing references that Robbins slips in here and there. Robbins' erudition is both his charm and partly his flaw - if you get his references, they are truly highlights of the book but if they fall on dear ears (as they occasionally do on this lay reader with a poor general knowledge) then this is where the 'I don't get Tom Robbins' clique comes into play. This is basically a story of transformation about a young trendsetter wannabe financial advisor hotshot, Gwendolyn, who after thinking she has lost it all when the stocks go south, discovers a new person, Larry Diamond, who not only brings new zest to her increasingly dissolute life but manages to change her perspective on life and what is really important. The problem is Gwendolyn has a Christian sweetheart boyfriend who is too nice to be true and on top of that his slightly unruly macaque/monkey pet who has an incorrigible sweet-tooth for banana popsicles and has run amok through the town. Gwen has to choose between Belford, her Christian boyfriend, or Larry - the new, intelligent but deeply mysterious person in her life who may or may not, as an ex-trader himself, hold the keys to her own blazing return to the financial scene. Won't spoil the fun for you anymore. Just get it and read it. Tom Robbins' writing is unforgettable - it is witty, intelligent, at times thigh-slappingly hilarious with a dash of lasciviousness added to the mix. Thank you once again to Larry for lending me his copy of this great book! Highly recommended.
What do You think about Half Asleep In Frog Pajamas (2010)?
I just re-read this book after like 10 years and I loved it so much more. The characters were as I remembered them, but I noticed so many things that I didn't remember were in this book.. like the whole subject of biodiversity and ecological stuff that I probably didn't really notice before..And I noticed this time around that most of it seems like Terrence McKenna was in the room when it was written.. I really needed a good dose of all that don't fall for the bullshit and it's not what it seems to be goodness that this book delivers.. It took me 10 years to really grok that title. But I've believed it all along, that we need to wake up to our roots, find the elemental connections.. that in our core somewhere we know.. and that reality that isn't at all material or measurable.. but, Tom and Terrence and many others describe it better so I'll leave it to them!
—Connie
Reading Tom Robbins is like reading Hunter S. Thompson. Almost everyone seems to go through that phase at some point, and then eventually that phase ends.I read every Tom Robbins book up to this one; I've yet to read his latest two (or three, or however many there are). Each of them is fantastic in its own way, although there are some consistencies in his style that are fantastic throughout his books -- his completely mind-blowing use of language in the service of crazy descriptions, analogies, and similes, and his Crazy Theory, that point of each book that would in a more traditional author be the denouement, but in the Robbins oeuvre is where he unveils whatever crackpot (and compelling, if you're predisposed to such thoughts, as I am) theory he's holding on to at the time.Of the books I've read, Another Roadside Attraction stands out for its audacity; Jitterbug Perfume for the incredible story and writing (I still remember this line from the intro, something that is nearly unprecedented for yours truly, Mr. Swiss Cheese head: "[They] say a story that begins with a beet will end with the devil; that is a risk we will have to take."Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas, however, is remarkable for two reasons: the "Tom Robbins' Crazy Theory" of the book is both the broadest and craziest of them all, and his use of the second person is a challenging, compelling and ultimately rewarding technique. Who writes in the second person anymore, and of those who do, how many of them choose such an unlikable character to make "you" identify with? Tom Robbins does, and he does it effortlessly well.
—Matt
Well, I made it to page 84 before giving up on this book. There was just too much about this book I didn't like to attempt to read on further. First off I don't care for the author's writing style whatsoever. The further into the book I read the more annoyed I got with his descriptions. At points it just seemed like words thrown together to use of space. The idea of reading the book as me being the main character was a neat concept, at least until I found that I could not stand the main character. (view spoiler)[ She's a shallow, whiny, money hungry girl who's only concern seemed to be tearing apart the people who don't fit into her ideals. When she decides to turn her judgement towards the only people she could have considered real friends I found the book got downright offensive. Seriously how many times does it need to get hammered into my head that Q-Jo is fat and that Belford is too much of a bleeding-heart? They seem to be okay with themselves but Gwen is so shallow she's embarrassed and disgusted by them. She's shallow to the point that I think I cracked my skull open just looking at the pool, no diving necessary. It's pretty much impossible for me to continue reading a book if I don't like the main character. In this case I could have cared less what happened to her. (hide spoiler)]
—Karen
