River drags her from one spot to the next—first to the swings and then to the slide. Then she has to show Layne the small koi pond and then the fire pit. Layne’s being a good sport by giving River the attention she craves and listening to every word she says like she’s the most important person in the world. Watching them together makes me feel like shit, because I realize how much River has missed having a real mother figure in her life. Rose is great and she takes good care of her, but River is old enough to understand that, while Rose loves her dearly, she’s a babysitter and not a mother to her. Part of me feels bad for not having someone special in my life that River can bond with, but the other part of me screams “hell no” every time I even consider it. That part is the one that always wins, because River is the one who’ll suffer the most if it doesn’t work out. She’s my one true love. She’s the one I’d defend with my life.
