I haven't been here since her funeral. I was too scared to come back—scared my guilt would conjure her ghost to haunt me. If I had only known staying away would be more damaging, I would never have abandoned her here, all alone.I lean my back against the stone and let myself slide down to sit on the cold ground below. I rest my head against the hard surface and look up to the sky, sighing."Hey, Aly, it's me. I'm sorry I haven't come to visit you. I miss you something crazy, but I didn't think you wanted to see me after what I did. That's why I wanted to talk to you. So much has happened since you left and I don't want you to hate me."I hug my knees closer to my chest and hold on tightly."I'm in love, Aly, and I don't deserve it. I don't deserve him. He's such a good man, and he makes me smile and laugh. Not that it matters. I was a bitch to him, and I threw him away."I let out a sarcastic laugh. Mixed with the tears, I sound like a croaking frog. Sadness becomes anger as I yell in the cold, "I don't know if I'm strong enough to do what I have to do.
