I’m not going to lie; I’m starting to feel really down the closer it gets to Christmas. I can’t explain it exactly but it is almost like a dark cloud has descended upon me. I’m snapping at Avery, Jenny and Andrew for no reason. It hurts watching them make Christmas cookies and I have to leave the room when they turn on the Christmas movies. I start sobbing when Christmas Vacation comes on for crying out loud. I’ve been keeping to myself more and spending lots of time in my room. I haven’t even bought any presents yet because quite honestly I can’t bring myself to do it. I crave that pill bottle like candy, but since it’s gone there’s nothing I can do about it. I’ve been taking long walks down to the little park about a mile away just to get away from all the holiday festivities. I like watching the leaves fly around and dance. I like the silence the park provides. I’ve even started bringing my camera out with me and taking pictures of the swirling red and orange leaves.
