Loving Your Kids On Purpose (2000) - Plot & Excerpts
A very helpful book on raising children to make decisions for themselves and learn from consequences, rather than controlling them and using fear, anger and punishment to get 'the desired result'.I found it very easy to read, with practical examples that help illustrate what it looks like in real life. This has changed how my wife and I raise our children, for the better. Danny has a certain communication style that doesn't necessarily appeal to everyone, but I hope that anyone who takes the time to read this book will find some benefit in their relationship with their children. This book has two strengths and one apparent weakness. I'll start with the apparent weakness, which is one of its strengths. I read this book while my wife was pregnant with my first child. We, like any typical American, were looking for some formulas on how to raise good kids. This book has no formulas. This book is not about formulas but about imparting of core values with examples. The main core value was the prioritization, above all else, of a heart-to-heart connection with your child, a prioritization of relationship over rules, the heart of a matter over external behavior, and of grace over law. A child cannot develop strong character and emotional intelligence without a parent being free of fear and ego.When my children disobey me, I don't take offense. I ask myself what motivates an act of disobedience or rebellion. If I don't prioritize a heart-to-heart connection with my child, my response to rebellion will come from a place of fear and ego creating mistrust in my children. Mistrust provides the most fertile soil for more rebellion.The second strength is in the usefulness of the core values in this book that go far beyond parenting into every other human relationship and especially to one's relationship with one's Father. Few books have more clearly revealed the heart of my Father to me than this book. It set me up to learn more from my kids about my Father than anything I think I have taught them up to now. This may not be technically true, but it certainly feels true.
What do You think about Loving Your Kids On Purpose (2000)?
Some really good points but a very long-winded way of saying it. I don't like the style of writing.
—Alex
Wow. Completely flipped my paradigm on its head and changed the way I parent. Thanks Danny!
—Deja
