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Read Mad Cows (2003)

Mad Cows (2003)

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Author
Genre
Rating
3.2 of 5 Votes: 3
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ISBN
0330334026 (ISBN13: 9780330334020)
Language
English
Publisher
macmillan _

Mad Cows (2003) - Plot & Excerpts

This book couldn’t have been unfunnier if it were about poor cows suffering from Mad Cow disease. It’s chick lit, not my favorite genre, but every now and then I come across a gem that I actually like. This wasn’t one of them.It’s about a brand new mom who just wanted to buy some prunes to help move things along but instead winds up in jail after a series of stupid coincidental calamities. We get to listen to her inane and crude thoughts as she prattles on about baby poop, drooping bellies, episiotomy plums in the undies and sore dripping teats. The father is a married jerk with twins who wants nothing to do with her and won’t bail her out. How shocking and original. From what I can gather she has no job, no skills, no brains and no sugar daddy. She fears social services will force her into adopting out the baby so she has a girlfriend (a middle aged Sex In The City wannabe type) sneak it out of jail and take care of it and then whines because her boobs are dripping and sore. The point of view then switches back and forth between the chick in jail and her vapid, materialistic and equally brain dead friend. I fear for the kid and for my brain cells. . . .It’s very dated. The only serious laugh I got out of the thing was when one of the jailbirds declares Mel Gibson ‘the perfect man’. The rest of the humor is insulting, rude or flat out gross.I usually finish audiobooks but don’t know if I can stomach any more of this annoying shit. It's so bad I'm almost hoping her hemorrhoids start up a dialogue and tell me about their day.

What do You think about Mad Cows (2003)?

The pace of the humour in this book was so frenetic it was like being assaulted. In any situation, jokes have primacy. It doesn't matter how dramatic or tragic a situation the characters find themselves in, they will always get a pun in at the very least. This is literature for people who want to have their funny bone tickled from the word go, and who don't mind a creaky overblown plot and a cast of exaggerated stereotypes. I swear there were no likeable men at all in this book, but we needn't worry about offending half the population, because the author mentioned sanitary towels in the first sentence, niftily ensuring none of them will read it anyway.I like a laugh, but this wasn't my style of humour. That doesn't make it a bad book, it's just a matter of preference. Many many people are going to be rolling around on the floor splitting their sides reading this. And even in my case, it had its moments. I loved the competitive mums at the baby group. And my favourite gag: "Maddy...couldn't think of one female who...would prefer to die rather than ask directions (which is why they now always include a token female on the space shuttle)" Oh yes, world class that one.
—Jayne Charles

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