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Read Mr. Darcy Takes A Wife: Pride And Prejudice Continues (2004)

Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife: Pride and Prejudice Continues (2004)

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3.37 of 5 Votes: 3
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1402202733 (ISBN13: 9781402202735)
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sourcebooks landmark

Mr. Darcy Takes A Wife: Pride And Prejudice Continues (2004) - Plot & Excerpts

When you want a taste of Tudor England, do you turn to Shakespeare, or do you watch The Tudors? You answer might determine whether or not you would enjoy Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife, a book that tries to hide the fact that it is a romance novel by pretending that it might have been imagined by Jane Austen.I can’t decide if this is a bad book or not. To me, there is a time and a place for the trashiness of The Tudors, or The Other Bolyn Girl, or the part of the BBC Pride and Prejudice when Colin Firth climbs out of the pond in his clingy shirt. That time, for me anyway, is when I need a break from whatever highbrow pursuits I might usually undertake. When, in other words, I just want to be entertained by pretty people walking through pretty landscapes, wearing pretty period clothes. And, you know … doing it.Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife begins with a note from the author about what a prude Jane Austen was. It offers this “sequel” as an antidote – and that’s the warning sign right there, on page iv. Actually, perhaps the warning sign comes earlier than you realize that you’ve never heard of this author OR the publisher before. You know what that means: other, nobler artists and editors turned this idea down.At first, the story doesn’t seem all that bad. The writing is almost kind of quaint: lots of words like “hence,” “solicitous,” and “chastement.” If you’re drunk, maybe you can even convince yourself that it sounds a little like a real Jane Austen book. And it opens with our beloved heroine, Lizzy Bennett Darcy, thinking back on her romantic, lustful wedding night. That’s not so bad, is it? Haven’t you always kind of wondered if they made as good a married couple as they did enemies?But then, by about page 18, the references to Mr. Darcy’s “easily agitated male instrument” begin. They don’t stop. And some of the descriptions are almost nightmarish: “manhood” (although, fine, I expected that one), “ampleness of his credentials,” “commodious organ,” “explicit bulge in the fork of his unhintables,” and so on. Yes, on that trashy level maybe it’s fun to read about how well-endowed Mr. Darcy is, (and I'm not talking about his money). And yet, I’m not sure I fully appreciate it. Will I be able to read Pride and Prejudice again without thinking of his “unhintables?” I really hope so.My annoyance at the language culminates with the author’s use of the word “compleat.” It’s on just about every page: compleat, compleatly, compleatness, etc. Come on. You are not Jane Austen, you don’t live in olden times – none of us are so confused to believe any of that, so I’m pretty sure you can use the modern spelling.Right now, my scales are tipping towards the idea that this book sucks. I just can’t decide whether it sucks so bad that it’s actually awesome.P.S. I just read this line, which is tipping the scales towards 'sucks': In discussing Kitty Bennett's propensity for swooning in front of potential suitors, the author says Kitty puts her "hand on the back of her forehead." Ok. So, I think we all know what she MEANT was "back of the hand to the forehead" since the back of the forehead is, what? The brain? But "back of the forehead" made it into the final draft, the draft that made its way onto a bookshelf. I didn't want to say so before, but now it appears that this book was edited by some livestock. It's called proofreading and everyone from first grade forward is encouraged to do it.

Okay... first and foremost... To the haters: Um, did the cover give you ANY inclination that this was going to satisfy your purist mind? The fact that you nearly see nipple on the cover didn't warn you at all?! Please, your ignorance borderlines on stupidity and you've practically insult your own intelligence by hoping that this was going to be "Jane Austen's stamp of approval". So therefore, I am going to open my mind and treat this book as an stand alone and not compare to Jane Austen's novel. Why? Because Jane did not write this, nor is she here to give her opinion and since her's is the only one that counts, I'm not sure I care what others think about this book. I will compare characters for the author in some areas did not continue the characters behavior or in some, maintain personality traits. Because the author took a chance at changing them and I respect her nerve for doing so, my opinion is going to (hopefully) be objective.So, this book starts were Pride and Prejudice stops. Lizzie and Darcy are married and are now about to discover the next chapter in their lives. But they find that there are a lot of problems for them to solve. For instance Jane and Bingley are having sexual "problems". Poor little Jane they spent all that time trying to GET together only to find that when they actually do, they aren't sure what to do with themselves. This is relative to the time because sex was very taboo and no one talked about it. If you had problems, then you pretty much swept it under the rug and not talked about it. Only Jane WANTS to please her husband and poor milk toast Bingley doesn't know how to be a man. It's all quite sad, but everyone has problems in a marriage. You have a lot of sympathy for Charlotte in this book. "Poor Charlotte" is seen more than once and who can blame her. For the time, she did what she had to in order to survive, but in the original novel, Charlotte has a room much like Mr. Bennet does to escape his wife. This goes into much more detail of Charlotte's discontent of not being a romantic woman and choosing to be practical woman for the time.The book in the beginning is rather intense with Darcy and Elizabeth on their honeymoon. It gets pretty raunchy (hence I said you crazy purists to stay the heck away from this book!) The beginning is not for those who've watched Babs in Yentl having sex through a hole in the sheet! Do I think that Darcy was a God in Bed? Geez! I hope so! Restraint before marriage is so tenuous that once you finally are able to through the unification of marriage, I dearly hope he was an ANIMAL in bed! But once you get to the middle of the book, everything seems to simmer down to a normal level and the sex scenes are subdued incredibly and that is when I found the author to relax into her story telling a better.I too am a purist of Jane Austen. The fact that she wrote what she knew tells a great deal of who Jane was. They say you write what you know and Jane obviously died a virgin for she never married and would never bring herself to be promiscuous. That said, Linda Berdoll has written a book that is about the ups and downs of two peoples marriage in 1790. This is a book about a time before it was time and I respect it as it is. The characters do not seem to possess the same wit of Jane's original work. In some areas I wished for Lizzie to come out with one really good verbal "zinger" to shut some people up, Collins in particular. So I gave this book 4 stars for the character development and the slow beginning.

What do You think about Mr. Darcy Takes A Wife: Pride And Prejudice Continues (2004)?

When I first started reading this book, I wasn't expecting Austen. Let's face it, nobody can do subtext, complexity, and wit as well as Austen can. So I wasn't completely disappointed by what I found in Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife, but I was disappointed.What I noticed straight off was that the characters were different. I can't put my finger on it, but they were a bit flatter, and didn't have as much complexity as I generally like my characters to have. There was no subtext going on in the background, everything was all very straightforward. Jane seemed way too good, in my opinion. And Bingley is ruined in this novel. Elizabeth is also not herself; she seems to care way too much about what Darcy thinks of her. In short, definitely not my favorite where characters are concerned.The second thing I noticed is that this entire book is just one big melodramatic event after another. I swear, it's a Pride and Prejudice soap opera. Nothing goes right for Elizabeth and Darcy, and they get into all sorts of trouble throughout the novel. What Berdoll lacked in characterization, she tried to make up for in plot. I was entertained by the ridiculousness of it all, but I'm not sure that's what I was supposed to like about it.There was one good thing about this novel, and that is its humor. I'm not sure if Berdoll intended for it to be funny, but I laughed for at least the first quarter of the book; especially during the honeymooning period. The euphemisms used for male and female body parts, and the way the sex is described made me feel like a thirteen-year-old again. I couldn't stop giggling!There's really nothing much in this book; the characters don't experience much change, there's not much of a plot, just various overly dramatic situations, lots of revelations of clandestine lovers, and the inadvertent comedy. The one saving grace, for me, was the fact that I listened to the audiobook. Rosalyn Landor's narration was perfect. Her careful pronunciation of the words and the prim and proper way she read it definitely made me think 19th century gentry. Her seriousness combined with the ridiculous plot lines and euphemisms really made me laugh. And, let's face it, the only thing this novel has going for it is the ridiculous drama and inadvertent comedy. Conclusion: Read it if you're interested, but don't expect anything great. The characters are off and all the subtlety and wit of Austen's Pride and Prejudice is blown to smithereens. If you're looking for Austen, this isn't it. If you're looking for ridiculous drama, you've come to the right book.
—Alyssa Archambo

Oh, gosh. I really have no excuse. As such, in my shame, I am going to patch together a review from other people's reviews, as I'm sure what needs to be said has been said. Note: these are all from the first page (of 47) of reviews, as I really can't take reading any more.I'm embarrassed to admit it--this was a totally enjoyable book (Susan). You cannot take it seriously or try to critique it academically (Ange pronounced Ahhh-nj). This is just smutty fanfiction that someone was able to get published (Cori). If you are looking for nothing more than a romance novel with fancy language and characters who just happen to share names with some illustrious literary figures, you might be pretty happy with your choice (Nicole). Instead of Austen's witty comedy of manners, this is a soap-operatic dramafest, with bastardy, rape, blackmail, stillbirths, adultery (Abbie). This is not Jane Austen. This will never be Jane Austen, as Jane Austen is dead. Purists shouldn't be reading Austen fan fic to begin with (Susan). No one will ever write like her again, so we better just buck up and admit that any book using the same characters and purporting to tell their story certainly will not be anything near a Jane Austen novel (Martha). As a study tool for the GRE, this might be useful (Alana). The language at times is florid to the point of silly (Susan). Many of the sentences are downright be-cramped with broken sentence structure and overwrought language (Valerie). People, Mr. Darcy takes a wife. A lot. All over the place. In various non-sexy and increasingly contrived scenarios (Edallia). Darcy and Elizabeth have a very passionate relationship (as we'd all hoped) but even I, who have been around the block a time or two, found myself muttering, "Geez, you two, take a break and have a spot o'tea" (Susan). They call their private bits things like "nonny-nonny" and "larrydoodle," nevermind the inevitable "torch of love" (Erica). A hilarious and satisfying read (Amanda).If you're the sort of person who giggles and says "Aw snap, Charlotte!", then this is a fun ride (Susan). Trashy fun...totally satisfying (Lara)! And, finally, (this is me not resisting some snipery): "Horrible sex scenes that have nothing in common with what we would expect from Lizzie and Darcy after P&P" (Nicole)? Really, Nicole? What DID we expect? Please illuminate us. And also, I will bet at least four of my toes that a very tiny number of people grousing about this not being a witty drawing-room comedy of manners or whatev take any interest whatsoever in contemporary drawing-room comedies of manners written by people who are the ACTUAL, if lesser, heirs to Austen. No writer who could legitimately be called an heir to Austen would ever, EVER, write any kind of Austeniana. You dumbasses. No one who picked up -- much less flipped through at the bookstore and spent $12.95 on -- this book in its gilted, nipple-baring cover has any right to complain. It really could not be clearer what you are (and are not) getting.
—Sarah

Please, don't read this book, or, if you feel compelled to, please don't tell me you did unless it is with the intent to vent your anger and frustration that such a travesty was ever published. If you do not feel highly protective of Darcy, Lizzie, Jane Austen, and all her writing stands for, you might get some enjoyment out of this book. If you love Jane for her satire and excellent but unforced language, as well as respectable characters, you might be brought to tears or to burning this book.Just a few of the myriad problems (and I give Dovey credit for identifying some of these):-Horrible sex scenes that have nothing in common with what we would expect from Lizzie and Darcy after P&P.-Word choice that is meant to be in the spirit of Jane's language, yet is pretentious and totally misses the spirit of how Jane wrote-General behavior that is constantly out of character, including extreme weak-spiritedness and self-pity out of Lizzie; a new, crude sex-maniac, alpha dog attitude from Darcy; and gentle Georgiana running off to become a nurse in France during the Napoleonic War for god's sake.If you are looking for nothing more than a romance novel with fancy language and characters who just happen to share names with some illustrious literary figures, you might be pretty happy with your choice. Outside of that, don't waste your time.
—Nicole

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