By then I had told my sister I was pregnant and she had helped me find an OBGYN. I borrowed her car and went to the appointment on my own. I knew couples usually went to these appointments together, but I still hadn’t told Derek that I was pregnant. After over a week of ignoring my calls, he had finally called me back but he didn’t acknowledge that he had done anything wrong. He was still playing childish games, while I was trying to figure out how to grow up fast. I realized he wasn’t ready to hear that I was pregnant. I felt like if I did tell him, he’d just let me down again. So when he called I acted like everything was okay and didn’t tell him about the baby. I was sad that I was keeping such a huge secret from him, but if I was going to share this experience with him I wanted it to be on the right terms, so I held it in.I kept the conversation short, and super casual. I didn’t mention I was mad at him, or that I had called him a couple of days earlier. I could tell he was just calling me back to meet up like we usually did, but I wasn’t ready to see him right then so I made up some excuse and got off the phone.
