Maybe too much. I liked her so much I couldn’t see the truth through her deception. I guess I wanted her to like me too. It was clear Mercedes had deceived me so that we could share a cabin. I was surprised she had the nerve to do that. I wondered if I needed to fear anything else, if she was not being truthful. That made me angry—angry with her; angry with myself. The fantasy bubble burst. Should I wake her up and confront her? No, maybe that would just make it worse, I thought then. What was I afraid of? Would confronting her end our relationship? What relationship? Was I confused, or what? Was I ashamed we spent the night together? No. If we hadn’t, would I have regretted not being with her? Yes. I needed time to get a handle on all of this. I had to think. Mike had said he left a message with Colleen, but she never gave us that message. She was still there when I arrived, but she never mentioned his call.
