With an agonizing slowness, he pushed the door open, straining his ears for any noise coming from the house. He nodded to himself several times, very enthusiastically. His entrance was a flawless masterstroke of almost-sober coordination, and it confirmed his status as a God among men. He stepped very slowly and deliberately into the house. He tried to shut the door with the same amount of quiet he had opened it with, but he slipped and the door slammed closed much louder than he had intended it to. Leaning against the wall for support, he checked his watch and realized that it was only almost 1. He’d decided to call off the movie, and instead found himself looking for a decent bar in this god-forsaken suburban hell-hole. He’d found one in the next town over, a blue collar dive bar with the right combination of cheap beer and an atmosphere that assured you that you’d be left alone. He nursed beers until the few sober bits in his head reminded him that he’d have to drive back home.
