I checked my phone every night, and every morning, resisted the uncontrollable urge to text her. I found myself typing in the words, and then deleting them before I could click send. I drowned myself in work and Ethan. Christine tried to talk to me about it, but I blew her off every time. My sisters and mother were the same way. I pretended like I didn’t know, or understand what they were talking about; even though I knew my emotions were displayed on my sleeves for everyone to see. Which is exactly why I avoided mirrors, or more than a few minutes to let my mind wander. I had Ethan on the floor playing with his cars, while I packed his overnight bag. My mom had been begging me to keep him over night for the last few weeks. I crouched down to his level. “You ready, buddy, Grammy is excited to see you.” “Vroom, vroom, vroom,” he related, sliding his toy car all over the floor.“That’s right, buddy, vroom,” I repeated.He looked up at me and shook his head. “No!” he shouted.
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