Simon here. Last night, as many of you will have seen, the Devil cast his giant shadow over the city and far out to sea. I know, I know, but Simon is just paid to read this stuff. Blame my producer Kate – she wrote it. Actually, Simon didn’t see the shadow and he’s truly cheesed off – it’s not as if he was doing anything more interesting. No offence, Phil, if you’re tuned in. And if you’re not – why not? ‘Anyways, a giant man with the head of a goat cast a shadow some ten miles long – that’s my kind of guy – from somewhere on the Devil’s Dyke – naturally – over the city and out to sea. Kate, I have to say I’m finding this hard to comprehend but I know we’ve had lots of calls from people who saw it. People who are freaking out, quite frankly. Calm down, madam. Oh, except I’m freaking out too so carry on.’ ‘Let me help you here, Simon,’ Kate said. ‘In certain atmospheric conditions this phenomenon is quite common.’ ‘A man with the head of a goat casting an enormous shadow over the city is common?
