One day this kingdom will all be theirsth! What? Cordelia loves me only as much as she should? What effrontery! For that sheʼll get naught. Nada. Zip. King of France took Cordelia. ʻLoveʼ or somesuch - as if she knows what that is! Luckily, Goneril and Regan love dear old Dad. Alright, Iʼm leaving, and taking a crew with me. Me and my boyz will be fine. Just fine. What, my ungrateful girls are kicking me out? Iʼll be cold and homeless. This sucketh. Very unexpected. Am I right? Seriously. They SAID THEY LOVED ME. I really do not get it. Who lies just because they know it will win them land and power?? I guess compared to ʻRonaldʼ and ʻGonorrheaʼ, Cordelia wasnʼt so bad. What a Shakespearean twist of events! They jail me, they betray me. I hear the French may come and put an end to this madness, though. Gloucester has it all worked out. Ah! Spoke too soon. Gloucesterʼs ʻvile jellyʼ had to be removed. And by ʻvile jellyʼ I mean his eyeballs. Clearly the best possible solution is to run around naked on a hill in a thunderstorm.
