When I Was Five I Killed Myself (2001) - Plot & Excerpts
Ho questo libro in libreria da chissà quanto tempo. Non ricordo nemmeno l'occasione in cui l'ho comprato, ma sono sicuro di averlo fatto. E' in effetti un tipo di libro che in un certo periodo della mia vita avrei comprato, letto e magari anche amato. Poi è semplicemente successo che, digerito una gran quantità di libri strani, scomodi, sconvenienti, ho cominciato a distinguere con giudizio tra opere buone e opere cattive. E questo libro, ahimè, rientra tra le seconde.Libro strano, scomodo e sconveniente, appunto. Tanto più che, pare, il suo autore non riuscì a pubblicarlo inizialmente nel suo paese, gli Stati Uniti, ma ottenne un inaspettato successo di pubblico e critica in Francia. Howard Buten, l'autore, è un tipo strano, fa il romanziere, il pagliaccio e lo psichiatra infantile specializzato in autismo. Il che rende chiara la derivazione di un libro come questo, che racconta il percorso di riabilitazione di un bambino apparentemente problematico, imprigionato in una casa di cura per "una brutta cosa" che ha fatto a una compagna di classe. Tutta la narrazione è dal punto di vista del protagonista, che idealmente racconta la vicenda scrivendola sulle pareti della sua stanza. Ci sono genitori lontani, che scrivono lettere, altri bambini problematici, dottori ciechi, infermieri buoni. L'autore racconta una vicenda per lui possibile in uno scenario che conosce bene, il che vizia un po' troppo il romanzo di una certa artificiosità. Non è la prima volta che leggo un romanzo di derivazione, per così dire, clinica, e ogni volta ho la stessa identica impressione: la vicenda è piatta come un referto medico, l'introspezione psicologica è solo un elenco di stati emotivi che nemmeno un dizionario medico. Anche con questo libro è così. Per non parlare poi di quanto sembri inverosimile l'intera vicenda e di quanto sembrino irreali tutti i personaggi, cominciando dal protagonista, alternativamente dipinto come un genio compreso, che parla con parole mature, e due minuti dopo sembra troppo stupido per la sua stessa età (si esprime come un adulto ma poi ammette candidamente di non sapere il significato del giallo lampeggiante dei semafori). Per non parlare dell'artificiosa ed esasperata ottusità del medico curante, contrapposta alla bontà di un sottoposto che pare troppo l'incarnazione letteraria dell'autore stesso. Quando poi sulla scena compare pure Jessica, supposta vittima, trasfigurata in femme fatale di soli otto anni, l'incredulità lascia posto al senso del ridicolo.Non capisco davvero il successo e lo scalpore suscitato da questo libro. Passi la protesta della comunità medica statunitense (che, a dirla tutta, mi sembra la più inadeguata a trattare con i bambini. Chi crede che la soluzione all'irrequietezza dei bambini risieda nei farmaci ha grossissimi problemi), ma per tutto il resto davvero non capisco. Non mi ha coinvolto, né commosso né indignato, mi è solo parso un romanzo che cerca di essere accattivante col pretesto di fare polemica, ma con il solo risultato di apparire inverosimile, scorretto e pure fastidioso.
Wow. Just.. wow. Flawlessly executed. Very few books alter the way I actually think; this one did. Also, I don't know if the author did this intentionally (I suspect he did) or if it was just my pre-existing prejucides and psychology background coming into play, but for a large part of the book I had a certain perception of the kid, the one that the adults in the book had, and then it gradually, and then abruptly, with a certain incident that had been hinted a lot, changed. And I felt guilty for my original perception, because I was thinking concretely and simple and.. adult-like. Which in this instance, were it a real event, would be a big mistake. So.. that's the way it changed my thinking. I'm trying not to be spoilery, which is why I'm being vague- because really the book is very suspenseful and I woudln't want to ruin that for anyone. Also this book was AMAZING in the way the author was able to successfully voice an 8-year-old boy. He didn't make him simple, which is what so many authors seem to do when trying to speak from the perspective of a child. Also, it should be noted that his book was very sad. Not because of the events so much (though those were too), but because of what people's (ok, the adults) actions implied about the way that adults think/act, and how horrible and tragic this is, really. Also.. I think the author deserves credit for recognizing that there are complex and mitigating factors to people. This makes me happy because he is a clinical psychologist who works with autistic children, as well as an author (as well as a performing clown!), and it's nice to know that someone so insightful is in the field- not pigeonholing and labeling children, which definitely sometimes happens in the field o' psychology. But anyway. That's just one of the many issues that this book manages to bring to mind. Oh, and in the introduction the author said he is an ingrate and has always felt that the world has owed him a living. But.. he deserves any success he has, just for this book alone, because this book is PERFECT.And lastly, just want to say, this book is a good example of an intriguing and weird title totally working. I didn't know about this book but picked it up because the title intrigued me. I'm glad I did, and glad they changed it from "Burt". I think the author mentioned that it was a bit of an experiment in marketing, changing the title. It was a success. And I'm glad America finally published this book.IN SUMMATION. You should read it. Seriously.Edit: And ignore all the people who compare this book to Salinger's writing in any way. They are wrong. Maybe this book is to France what "Catcher in the Rye" is to America (in that it's widely read), but that's where the similarity ends. The writing is not Salinger-esque at all. It doesn't remind me of anything I've read before (though I certainly haven't read everything, and if there's more writing like this I'd like to find it).
What do You think about When I Was Five I Killed Myself (2001)?
I put only three stars to that book, because I got a little bit disappointed. Indeed, before reading the book I had seen the movie. The movie is really well-done, poetic, wonderful and consequently I expected a lot from this book (perhaps too much). Usually it is quite the opposite; the book is often better than the movie, but here is (according to me) an exception.J'ai mis que trois étoiles, car ce livre m'a un peu déçu. En effet, avant de le lire, j'avais vu le film qui est très bien tourné, poétique, magnifique. Par conséquent, j'attendais beaucoup de ce livre (peut-être trop). En général c'est l'inverse ; le livre est souvent meilleur que le film, mais dans ce cas-ci, il s'agit (selon moi) d'une exception
—Juliette
This is a fantastic book! Written convincingly from the perspective of linguistically-intelligent eight year old (Burt), this is a very disturbing account. There are elements of this book (Burt's character, in particular) which are left open to the reader's interpretation. This means that there is a lot to think about once you have finished reading.This book is not suitable for everyone as it is implicitly alarming towards the end. However, I found the elements relating to the children's "Home" even more unsettling that the 'incident' itself (eg. the almost spiteful priorities of Burt's case worker; the overall lack of understanding of Burt's situation; and the lack of willingness to help Burt appropriately.)I have read some reviews which complain of the book's abrupt ending. It is very short, but if I had the power to make it longer I would like to have read more of Burt's flashbacks to his time at school rather than to have extra chapters at the end. I think the author chose an ideal place to finish.
—Sammie
My copy of this is meant for German speakers learning English, so I didn't have a clue what it's about until I read it, and it had the odd word translated in footnotes. I don't speak German (although once I went to Berlin and picked up enough to discuss English beers) so I got carried away with the funny sounding compound words; it was distracting. Some German student somewhere probably understands some of the colloquialisms better than I do because they're not explained in English.Anyway, the story and childish writing style make for a really charming novel. You'd like it if you like The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime. The blurb above gives a bit much away but there's yet more to it than that. All the characters are secretly depressing but the narrator is too young to understand that they are and is matter-of-fact and tangential. The dialogue includes a lot of funny things funny kids would say, lots of misinterpretations of the real world, lots of poignancy through innocence. The whole story pivots on innocence, actually. It's thematic. I'd be sort of surprised if this wasn't banned at some point. A lot of brilliant books have been.
—Bob Hartley
