But it wasn’t a spark. It just looked like that from Earth. If you’d been close enough, you would have seen it was a bum. An enormous bum. An enormous white bum. An enormous white bum with most of the skin on its right cheek missing and its many deep layers of blubber on fire. This was no ordinary bum. This was the Great White Bum. And it wasn’t happy. In fact it was furious. Furious at having had its dream of total bumination of the Earth ripped from its grasp at the last moment. Furious at all the bums on Earth who had let it down by abandoning the bumcano just when it was about to blow and knock out every human being on the planet. But, above all, the Great White Bum was furious at Zack Freeman, the chief architect of the predicament it now found itself in: hurtling through space—half dead, on fire and too weak to stop itself.
