Thankfully it wasn’t portal light. There was nothing supernatural about it, unless you counted what was surely an out-of-this-world price tag. The League of Social Betterment Through Bettering Oneself was known for their splashy events: bacchanalias of such jaw-dropping excess, even Hugh Hefner would be like, “Hey, maybe take it down a notch.” I found this amusing, since the League was supposedly based around the principle of finding ways to be less wasteful in our everyday lives, their website littered with such statements as: “Go green!”, “Take a bus/bike/unicycle!”, and “Save the red panda!” (Fuck the regular panda, I guess.) I couldn’t recall what this particular benefit was supposed to be benefitting, but every League benefit had a theme, and tonight’s shindig—situated in the vast ballroom of one of the Financial District’s generically sumptuous hotels—was simply entitled “Space.” (Maybe it was benefitting red pandas . . .
