24 Some very bad news Before Mr Brainfright could answer Fiona, the classroom PA speaker crackled into life. ‘Attention, crew,’ said the voice of Principal Greenbeard, ‘I have some news of a dire nature to impart. Batten down the hatches. I repeat, batten down the hatches.’ Now, before I go on, what you should know about Principal Greenbeard is that he loves ships and sailing. And when I say he loves ships and sailing, I mean he really loves ships and sailing. In fact, he loves ships and sailing so much that he acts as if the school is one huge ship, that all the teachers and students are sailors, and that he, of course, is the captain. It’s important that you know this, otherwise you might think he is a bit crazy. Well, obviously, he is a bit crazy, but he isn’t all crazy. He’s just crazy about anything to do with ships and sailing. And when he says batten down the hatches, that means trouble.
