Quite Enough Of Calvin Trillin (2011) - Plot & Excerpts
That would be prejudice, and you girls have been brought up to abhor prejudice. Daddy has never met a cat that he liked.” Loaded for Raccoons When the raccoons started getting at the garbage cans this summer, I naturally consulted the man in our town we call the Old Timer. He’s the one who told me that we could assure ourselves clear water by keeping a trout in the well, although, as it turned out, I couldn’t find a trout except for a smoked trout that some guests from the city brought as a sort of house gift, and I didn’t think it would be terribly gracious of me to toss that down the well, even assuming a smoked trout would do the trick. He’s also the one who’s always saying things like “A porcupine that looks kinda cross-eyed will attack a house cat lickety-split.” “You already tried red onions, have you?” the Old Timer said when I told him about my raccoon problem. I really hate it when the Old Timer asks questions like that. The only acceptable answer is something like “Well, naturally, that’s the first thing I did, but for some reason it didn’t work; must be the wet spring we had for onions is all I can think of.”
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