Dalai Lama believes in fundamental goodness in all human beings, in the value of compassion and kindness, and a sense of commonality among all living creatures.Happiness is determined more by one's state of mind than by external events.Excessive desire leads to greed, which leads to frustration, disappointment, problems and unhappiness.True antidote of greee is contentment - to appreciate what we already have.Relationships are not about just knowing people and superficial exchange, but to really share deepest problems and concerns in forming intimate friendships. Dalai Lama recommends maintaining closeness with as many people as possible, aim to connect with everyone in some way.Concepts of intimacy vary among cultures. Western.... too caught up in finding "one special person" or romantic partner who we hope will heal our loneliness, yet prop up our illusion that we are still independent.If we think of suffering as something unnatural, something that we shouldn't be experiencing, then it's not much of a leap to begin to look for someone to blame for our suffering. If I'm unhappy, then I must be the "victim" of someone or something. As long as we view suffering as an unnatural state, an abnormal condition that we fear, avoid and reject, we will never uproot the causes of suffering and begin to live a happier life.It is entirely appropriate to seek out causes of our problems, searching for solutions on all levels - global, societal, familial, and individual. Shifting to wider perspective - realizing there are many people who have gone through similar & worse experiences - can be very helpful.If you learn to develp patience and tolerance toward your enemies, then everything else bcomes easier - your compassion towards all others begins to flow naturally. Compassion is the essence of a spiritual life. The enemy is the necessary condition for practicing patience. Friends don't often test us, so our enemy is a great teacher.Flexibility of the mind, those most adaptable to change will survive best.
As many other reviews have noted, despite the picture of His Holiness on the cover, this book was actually written by psychiatrist Dr. Howard C. Cutler. The only redeeming qualities of the book were the quoted sections in which Cutler quotes or perhaps paraphrases His Holiness. Unfortunately, such instances do not comprise the majority of the book. Instead, Cutler openly assesses Buddhist concepts in the framework of Western thought, which I found incredibly arrogant. He never fails to "justify" a Buddhist concept with scientific data. The whole point in my reading this book as opposed to the hundreds of other self-improvement books is that it presents a perspective different from its Western counterparts - it depicts the ideology of a wise and humble Dalai Lama who has devoted his life to Buddhist training and understanding. Instead, I keep reading "studies show..." Furthermore, he often fails to properly cite said studies, so we are left with the all-knowing scientists speaking truths about the world without the credibility of a scientific journal or proper scientific text. Essentially, read it for the sections in which His Holiness is quoted (which are quite informative and insightful) but don't expect to escape Western ideology. *Also, a lot of the Buddhist concepts were simplified or not explained at all (probably because Cutler was unable to understand the abstract philosophies of Buddhism), so if you want to really understand Buddhist teachings, try one of the other books written by the Dalai Lama or The Way of the Bodhisattva.
What do You think about The Art Of Happiness (1998)?
"Human emotions are very powerful and sometimes overwhelm us. This can lead to disasters. Another important practice in training our minds involves distancing ourselves from strong emotions before they arise in us. For example, when we feel anger or hatred, we may think, “Yes, now anger is bringing me more energy, more decisiveness, swifter reactions.” However, when you look closely, you can see the energy brought about by negative emotions is essentially blind. We find that instead of bringing thoughtful progress, there are many unfortunate repercussions. I doubt whether the energy brought about by negative emotions is really useful. Instead, we should analyze the situation very carefully, and then, with clarity and objectivity, determine that countermeasures are called for. The conviction “I must do something” can give you a powerful sense of purpose. This, I believe, is the basis of a healthier, more useful, and productive energy.[image error]
—Gina
I'm curious how this book would impact someone with no knowledge of Buddhism/meditation or with a different religious upbringing. I loved the book, but I'm part of the flock so to speak. There's a lot of talk about training the mind, and how we cause our own suffering, and the work it takes to end that suffering and have happiness and I think it's all spot on. Does this book hold the answer to how to be happy? I think so. Does that mean you'll instantly be happy after finishing the book? Not at all. But would you have the tools you set your mind right after reading it? Absolutely.Loved this part, discussing people believing in and respecting different religions:"Then it's like going to a restaurant--we can all sit down at one table and order different dishes according to one's taste. We might eat different dishes but nobody argues about it."The antidote to anxiety: "If there is a solution to the problem, there is no need to worry. If there is no solution, there is no sense in worrying either."
—SooYoung
I really liked this book. It has enough information to open your eyes, but not too much to scare you away. The Author, being a psychologist, was able to take the Eastern ideas from the Dalai Lama and compare them to a more Western way of thinking. Although I've seen many of the ideas and thoughts in other books, the Dalai Lama had a way with words that seemed to just -click- with me, and in the sections that I didn't really understand, Howard Cutler, the author, was able to clarify. This book is good for anyone who may be stuck in the same way of thinking...its a good starter for those who are just getting into 'eastern views'.
—Whitney
