The Elegant Gathering Of White Snows (2003) - Plot & Excerpts
It took me a long time to read the first 3 chapters, and the only thing that kept me going was that I knew my daughter would ask me how I liked it (she loaned it to me). I started it because it was supposed to be all about friendship, but most of those first chapters leaned very much toward the 'I-am-woman, men-are-pigs' outlook: men are lazy, men get drunk and slap women around, men sleep around, men are lucky to have us, etc. All of those things are true about some men, and all of those things are true about some women. The basic story here is that 8 women who are in a Friendship Club (they call it their weekly Study Group) suddenly decide to go for a walk in the middle of the night - and they just keep on walking and talking, leaving their families to fend for themselves. Mary decides she is happy with her life the way it is - she loves her husband & kids, she enjoys being a homemaker - and she tells the others she's going back home. Although the other women end up affirming her choice, I was left with the idea (from the author) that Mary was a cop-out, accepting less than she could be. Even later on, Mary is not portrayed as happy with her life, but as someone who is "content with the confines society has set". It was almost like the author was saying, 'she's happy, but she doesn't know any better' - that attitude bothered me.So why have I rated this a 4*?! Well, it's a weak 4*, but 3* just wasn't enough to show how much I enjoyed most of the rest of the book - the profiles of the walkers and of other women who heard about the walkers (Margaret's story was just totally heartbreaking, and it had nothing to do with bad choices and weak or abusive men). Unfortunately, the 'men-are-pigs' idea sneaks back in every now and then: when two of the women are talking about their husbands, one makes the remark that their men are basically hanging on to a good thing - this is after we've read their profiles and know what difficult times both women have put their husbands through, and the men were always there for them!Oh, well! If you can get past this apparent mindset of the author, this is a book worth reading - and the friendship theme is really there, including stranger-to-stranger friendliness and kindness.
Ever have to read a book because a Good Friend knows the author and she's “really wonderful”? This was a first, and a true, unrequited act of friendship. I needed gold lame slippers, a fake fur, some Kleenex, and a big box of bon bons in order to do this book justice. Some of the precious moments included:Experiences we can all relate to:(teenage daughter says, in front of her teenage friends): “Mom, you were my first friend – don't you know that that you taught me how to be a friend?...how to keep a friend in my heart?”Witty metaphors and non sequiturs:after they “pounced in the pond like dolphins”...She asked “doesn't this make you want to pee?”...“All the time, but who cares? The only time I really feel beautiful and thin is when I'm in water.”Liberally sprinkled with such insightful ah ha! moments as:“Maybe things were simpler back then....by having conversations that were meaningful...Sometimes it takes a long, long time to figure out how to be happy. Seems to me it might never be too late, though.”and“Claudia was wondering about their lost loves, missing dreams, what they had all left behind.”and"Every day of my life is a gift that might be taken away.”Epiphany:“...my mother knows that she is here inside my beating heart, maybe she will fly free herself....she will know that she was wonderful and made me wonderful, too, and whole and happy.”So the next time I saw said friend (the Recommender) I asked if she had read the book. Of course not.
What do You think about The Elegant Gathering Of White Snows (2003)?
I'm struggling to get through this book. Basically it is about a bunch of middle aged women who decide that every trouble in their life is caused by the men in their lives and they decide to go walking on the highway - Forrest Gump style - not talk to anyone and just bitch and moan about the problems in their lives. While I think there is a place for this type of book, I know that for the 100 pages I read this book, I was a total cranky wench to all the men in my life (my husband and three sons). While it is good and fine to complain about how messed up your life is because of a man, I decided that it was best for me to put this book down so I can live in harmony with the men in my life for the time being.Also, like with all female empowerment novels, this book touts the tale that you are no one unless you have a best friend or a club of best woman friends. Another case of I love this idea, but in my own life, totally useless. I'm not a good woman friend. I don't have BFFs. I wish I could, but I seem to sabotage every close female relationship or club relationship. Another way i cannot relate to this book.
—Shannan
This book is ridiculous. I enjoyed the premise, but was disappointed with the author. It reminded me of the kids in junior high/ high school that always made me roll my eyes as I walked past...the ones who tried to cram as many swear words and sexual references into their conversations as possible. I tried to get through it because I enjoyed the characters and wanted to see what would happen to them and how their lives would change, but I ended up not finishing. The clincher for me was a sentence that described the Wasatch Mountains (which I happen to have a beautiful view of from my living-room window) as "penis-like". Are you kidding me?!Also, I found the constant woman-power sentiments annoying and over-the-top.
—Heidi
It was an interesting premise and at first I was enjoying it, but by the midpoint it had become far too smarmy and touchy-feely for me. Each woman's unique yet "universal" (as we are constantly reminded) story unfolds, and if that's not enough, the author throws in random stories of women who are magically transformed by reading about the women walkers in the news. It's such an Oprah worthy story that the author finally mentions her in the epilog. It's a spiritual journey, but the author wants us to know how hip she is by having the women recount plenty of sex stories, and by being sure to include several gay characters. Unfortunately the diversity stops there. These are all upper middle class white bread (pun intended) women.
—Cindy
