WAS I LYING TO ANGIE? I DIDN'T WANT TO. BUT WHAT IF I WASN'T GAY? WHAT IF I COULD CHANGE?I got down on my knees and prayed harder than ever: "Jesus, you've got to help me. You know I don't want to hurt Angie. I want to change. I'm trying hard. But I need your help. Please? In your name. Amen."I lay down in bed and stared at the crack in the ceiling that branched off in different directions. Eventually, my thoughts twist-and-turned back to St. Paul's Epistle to the Romans and the things that Manuel had said. From my nightstand I picked up my Bible.In Bible studies I'd learned that St. Paul had written the letter to the church at Rome, which consisted of Christians from both Jewish and Gentile (non-Jewish) backgrounds, in part to try to get the two groups to stop judging each other harshly.Chapter i began by affirming that the gospel was for everyone, including both Jews and Gentiles. Then, at verse 1:22, the letter began to condemn Gentiles who had turned to worshipping115idols: Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man or birds or animals or reptiles.Directly following that came the part that Pastor Jose and my other church teachers had used to preach against gays: Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator....
