You Can't Get Blood Out Of Shag Carpet: A Study Club Cozy Murder Mystery (The Study Club Mysteries Book 1) - Plot & Excerpts
did flaunt the usual conventions of appropriate funeral attire. Granted, she was wearing black. At least the top half of her was wearing black. The strapless low-cut bodice of her dress was skin tight, boosted to its full potential by what was, no doubt, a “lift and separate” Playtex bra living up to its promise to make a woman “shapely.”Every man in the sanctuary that morning offered up silent but reverent prayers, earnestly entreating the Almighty to please make Melinda Sue bend over just enough that they could be treated to the religious experience of her décolletage in all its glory.Her waist was cinched into a black patent leather belt from which descended a gaudy harlequin check full skirt, resplendent in diamonds of pink, red, black, and green. She was using her impeccable pageant posture to balance on a set of black stiletto heels that looked more like weapons than footwear. And, of course, there was her trademark hair ribbon, scarlet satin today, taking the place of the tiaras she longed to win and could only glimpse from afar.Yes, Melinda Sue had been Miss Bait and Ammo when she was 16, but there had been no tiara, only a camouflage sash emblazoned with her title and a rhinestone headband.
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