5. Monkeys, Rats, Jockeys and Other Animals Each United Kingdom airport has a rating as to what creatures can be landed there: during my time in Customs, Heathrow and Gatwick had full tickets and could take anything; Stansted could accept livestock, pet birds and Chelsea supporters (and I should know, I am one). As we had no quarantine facilities, we could not accept dogs, so we became known for our horse and cattle flights. It’s not really widely known among the public but every single day horses fly in and out of the country. How do these animals even get a pilot’s licence? I hear you ask. Well, actually they’re being transported – no, not to the French as burger meat – but mostly as the incredibly expensive, highly strung and unpredictable freight we call racehorses. They’re moved all over the world from meet to meet and they travel so often that, believe it or not, they even have their own passports. (I know, again I hear you ask, how on earth do they get them in a passport booth for the photo?
