Belly Laughs: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy And Childbirth (2005) - Plot & Excerpts
(review originally posted on bookslut)After my request for book recommendations in my last column, I should be busy for the next year and a half, especially considering the 100 Books list books I am supposed to be reading, along with my backlog of review books. Maybe I should have been going for my Ph.D. in literature. Or women's studies. Or any subject for which all of this reading would be helping, not hindering, my research.Oh well. If I'd had that much foresight, I probably would have taken a pass on reading Jenny McCarthy's Belly Laughs. But surprisingly, her book was much less awful than I anticipated. In fact, I even found myself giggling furtively, hoping not to catch Jessa's attention while she was checking her email on my computer, lest she think I actually liked it.I suppose we should clear the air on one issue before I go on. I can't stand Jenny McCarthy. Being one of about a billion Jennifers, Jennys, and Jens in the world, I am very protective of our collective image and get hostile when someone portrays us badly. And Jenny on MTV was obnoxious. Worse, in college I was forced (by my own inertia really, being too lazy to get off of the couch and leave the room) to watch some Jenny McCarthy soft-porn special on the Playboy Channel. (Ummm, I was in a co-ed fraternity in college. But that's a whole other column.) As a result I can say with authority: Those boobs ain't real.Which actually is the most unique thing about Jenny's book. She doesn't give a damn about real. Which is almost refreshing, given that everything you read these days in modern maternity magazines is all about natural childbirth. You have to have a midwife. You shouldn't get an epidural. You have to breastfeed. From reading Jenny's book, it's clear she never gave any of this very authoritative advice a second's thought. There are no midwives in sight, she never seems to even contemplate a drug-free child-birth, and she unapologetically does not breastfeed. But on the other hand, her book is so sparse that you never know if this is a result of a conscious choice. Did she just wake up one morning, throw her copy of Fit Pregnancy against the wall, and scream "Screw this hippie shit! I want the good drugs!", or was she just kind of floating along, going with the flow?At 165 pages, there isn't a lot of depth or introspection on any topic. Which is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because I was so tired of reading this book by about page 100, but a curse because some of her chapters are actually really funny. Any chapter dealing with hormonally induced emotional changes, especially if it involves fights with her husband, is quite humorous. Chapters dealing with complete strangers feeling like they could tell her how to live her life just because she was pregnant made me fall over laughing. Also, perhaps predictably, all chapters dealing with bodily functions such as puking, peeing, farting or pooping merited reading aloud to whoever was nearby.In fact, given her reputation for obnoxiousness, and her disclaimer in the introduction to the book about how frank she is, how open she is, and the fact that she was 99% naked on the freaking Playboy channel, her downright prudishness in talking about sex was shocking. See, apparently Jenny can't bring herself to say the word masturbation. Talking about hemorrhoids? Fine. Constipation? Great! The m-word? Oh no. We'll stick with charming phrases like "going at it alone."I think that not too far in the future, some graduate student somewhere could write a thesis on all the neuroses and issues revealed by Jenny in her little book, but until I can figure out a way to relate it all to environmental science, that student will not be me. In the meantime, unless you're a really big fan of Jenny McCarthy, or are just craving some cotton candy for your brain after reading mammoth tomes on maternity, go ahead and pass on this book. Although she promises to reveal all the dirty secrets of pregnancy in her book, only two of her chapters covered anything I hadn't heard 10,000 times before. (Did you know that women usually poop on the table during childbirth? Great. I'm so glad I have to look forward to that now.) And those I probably could have lived without anyway. She writes as if she wants to be your main source of information for pregnancy side effects, but treats each subject so briefly (a typical chapter is about four pages long) that not much real information is imparted. The book is mainly a delivery system for about a dozen genuinely funny anecdotes about her pregnancy, most of which occur in the first quarter of the book, so that by the last quarter, you'd almost rather poop on yourself than keep reading.That was a little scatological. That damn Jenny must be rubbing off on me.
You can read this review and others on my blog at http://awriterswife-bcray.blogspot.co...Well this book wasn’t very funny to me. It also wasn’t very helpful either. This entire book is basically just a biography about her own pregnancy, not pregnancy in general. So if you’re hoping to read this to really find out what to expect, pick up something different that at least shows all the differences. Every pregnancy is different, but this entire book only focuses on her symptoms, etc.Things that I hated about this book:1) It only focused on her pregnancy. I’ve never been pregnant before so I would like to know what I should be expecting as the weeks go on. However, I’m halfway through now and have not experienced half the things she did, and I certainly didn’t react the way she did. If she’s going to title her book “The naked truth about pregnancy”, then it should run the gambit of what you can expect. Otherwise, it should be “The naked truth about MY pregnancy”.2) The language she used. She swears a lot. Using swear words is NOT necessary to get your point across. I just found that it was tacky and actually jarred me out of whatever annoying story she was telling. It made me really not care about whatever she was trying to explain to me. Maybe you talk like that (however I don’t even think you need to swear when you talk), but definitely not in a published book.3) Her relationship with her husband. My husband and I have a caring relationship. We actually care about each other. And though we like to tease each other, we do it in an innocent way. We would never tease each other in a hurtful way. Though, I do know several couples whose relationships are built that way, and it works for them. But not for us. So her stories about how her husband would egg her on when she was in a bad mood, or stopped the car when she had to pee, is not something I would ever experience. Sure, my husband might tease me about the amount of times I changed my mind on what sounded good for dinner…but he would never make me sit down and eat it just because he thought it’d be funny. And I would never, ever throw something at my husband (without it being a pillow in a teasing manner). I would never throw TV remotes at him in a fit of rage. Just because you’re pregnant and have more emotional fluxes, it doesn’t give you the right to be a raging lunatic. You still have morals free will. You can choose to give in to it or not.4) Her constant mention of her “celebrity” status. I could care less. 90% of the world does not deal with those problems. So why is that included in a pregnancy book? It was a brag book for her. I don’t care that she had to watch her weight or hide her pregnancy because she was famous. How in the heck does that relate to pregnancy? And then the story about how she was able to get a table at a specific restaurant because she was famous just annoyed me to no end. That does not help any woman who is not pregnant. UGH.5) The book told you a little about what happened during labor and delivery. But it’d didn’t go in to detail. And it certainly didn’t tell you anything about what to expect AFTER delivery. How does a pregnancy book not describe what to expect after delivery? The only thing I liked about this book was that it was short. And that I was given this book by a friend and I didn’t spend my own money on it. I do not plan to read any more of Jenny McCarthy’s books and I certainly do not recommend it to any first time moms. Perhaps the people who enjoy this are ones who are on their third or fourth kid and just need something to pass the time. So her story is more entertaining. But we moms who have never been through this and wanted to be prepared, this book does not help one bit.
What do You think about Belly Laughs: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy And Childbirth (2005)?
I loved this book. Let's be honest...there are enough pregnancy books and apps out there that scare the shit out of you and teach you all about what to eat, warning signs, things you cannot do, meds you cannot take, the amount of weight you should and should not gain, blah blah blah. The truth is, being a nurse and a generally intelligent person I don't really need all that. This is not one of those books. In fact I really didn't learn much by reading it. But what it did do is make me laugh till I was in tears. All those things you never knew about being pregnant...such as the fact that even though non-pregnant you doesn't think you will, you will absolutely become a constipated, puking, crying psycho with giant boobs and granny panties....it just makes it so much better to hear someone else went through that, and that you are normal. I found the book very encouraging and very refreshing be to read. I would definitely recommend for any first trimester mommas out there!
—Laura Lezon
Belly laughs is Hilarious ,like all jenny's books,it's so funny ,honest and personal .she tells it like it is ,giving pregnant women a new and lighthearted perspective on pregnancyJenny's pregnancy and childbirth wasn't easy to say the least and it all seems so Scary but it's a fun journey nonetheless!I always wondered what it would feel like to give birth and telling from her story it's like roller coaster ,as jenny wondered "how are you supposed to push a watermelon through your vagina?" And there is also the fear of pooping on the table hahahaha I never thought about that :DVery entertaining book and A Must-read for pregnant women and even if you are not pregnant ,you will enjoy it all the same :)
—Mai
I've received countless recommendations for pregnancy books. Most of them are the size and readability of text books. I was hoping the end of this pregnancy would result in a baby, not a final exam. I've taken the classes, read a newsletter every week given to me by my doctor, done research, etc. I finally found a pregnancy book worth it's weight in gold. I LOVE this book! I don't really need a chart to tell me how many people get hemorrhoids, I want to know if there's any way to avoid those damn things and what to do should they occur. Hilarious book that's light and funny but truly helpful and supportive.
—Cvedder
