Homicidal Aliens And Other Disappointments (2013) - Plot & Excerpts
Everyone seems eager to talk about anything other than what just happened at the meeting. So Michael and Sam start discussing how some people are so poor at breaking up that they drive old girlfriends into the arms of first-class jerks. “I didn’t break up with her,” I point out. “Dude, you knocked her out and left with another girl,” Michael says — and not for the first or even the tenth time. More in the twenty range. I’m glad it’s dark and I can’t see Catlin’s face and she can’t see mine. “I’d call that a bad breaker-upper,” Sam says. I turn to Michael. “I suppose you’re a good breaker-upper.” “I’m excellent. My friends used to all come to me for advice. It’s all in the tone of voice. Of course, I never knocked anyone out. I’m not sure even I could smooth that over.” “I didn’t knock her out to break up with her! I did it because I was trying to save you. We all make mistakes.” “Even though you’re probably the worst breaker-upper ever,”
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