I know you’re probably tired of hearing from me, but I can’t help it. You’re the only one that can help me. I’m sorry about the things I’ve said about You in the past, and I’m sorry for not keeping my faith and trusting you when Mama died. It’s just that losing her hurt so much, and I didn’t understand then like I do now. Look, I know I should just be grateful that I’m alive right now. You could have cut me off and sent me to hell, but You had mercy on me. I don’t have the right to ask You for anything else, but…I need you. Please, help me. My life is a mess and I know it’s my fault. I made a lot of stupid mistakes and I know I’ve got a lot to pay for. But I don’t want the people that I love to have to suffer because of what I’ve done. Show me what I need to do to fix things. I’ll do whatever you want me to, just show me…” Jim had managed to sit himself on one of the carpeted steps at the altar where he was praying. He had come to the church early with Pastor Bynum who was up in the office with the other clergy and ministerial staff preparing for today’s service.
