Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan For Finding Peace In A Frantic World - Plot & Excerpts
I’m still alive. I have all four limbs and my mind seems more or less intact. While I was meditating, I realized that I was continually losing focus. My mind felt out of control. No matter what I did, my mind would not settle. This was partly because I’d had a particularly bad day at work. I’m a legal clerk. I pride myself on always getting everything ready for a case, come what may. Today I didn’t finish on time: I’d mislaid some of the paperwork. I could tell my boss wasn’t pleased. Normally, when I’m stressed, I’ll go down to the bar and have a few drinks and then get up the next morning, ready to get going again. But today was different. Instead of drinking, I decided to meditate. It was hard, hard, hard. I hate this feeling of being out of control; I feel as if I’m not good enough—just a failure—and after a while, it felt that I was a loser at meditation too. After twenty minutes of struggling, I opened my eyes and realized that compared to before, and to my normal state of mind, I was actually quite calm.
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