—PUBLILIUS SYRUS Every time you start thinking up insults for yourself about how difficult you are to live with, how awful you’ve been to your husband, or what a terrible job you’re doing with surrendering, stop and replace the thoughts with a compliment for yourself. Just as you wouldn’t scream at a child who stumbles as he learns to walk, don’t be harsh with yourself as you learn to surrender. Instead, acknowledge your progress and offer yourself some encouragement. When I first started surrendering, I suddenly became aware of all the things I did that I wished I didn’t do—but I couldn’t change my behavior so immediately. It made me feel so rotten that I was tempted to go out and eat some worms to punish myself. I call this Worm Syndrome. If you can’t stop controlling your husband perfectly (and nobody can), every time you slip, you feel shame on top of your sadness. Here’s an analogy: Let’s say that you discover that you’re dairy intolerant, which is causing you discomfort.
What do You think about The Surrendered Wife (1999)?
